Thursday, July 27, 2006

Dublin Port Tunnel Canal

In an expansion on his proposal to build a roadway over the Liffey, Minister for Transport Martian Luccen has announced a plan to use the beleaguered Dublin Port Tunnel as a canal link.

Today's Irish Independent reports: "Persistent leaks have put the opening of the €800m Dublin Port Tunnel on indefinite hold. The project is now more than two years overdue and it has missed at least four separate completion deadlines."

The Skanger managed to join the Minister over a game of Scalextric for a chat on the matter. "What with the water coming in anyways, I figured, if you can't beat it, join it. So I'm going to employ consultants to draw up proposals for the consideration of a feasibility study to look into announcing a public consultation on the idea of using the Dublin Port Tunnel as a canal," the Minister explained.

"We'd call it the Dublin Port Canal," an official stated. According to the Irish Independent, "A joint inspection report on the tunnel completed at the end of May revealed several areas were leaking, and in more than one spot. One area had three leaks in the space of one square metre, while other sites had leaks in sections 20 metres wide."
Minister Luccen's plan will see narrowboats and barges using the Port Canal
Dublin already has two canals, the Royal and the Grand, both of which, the Minister stated, "Are very popular amenities." The Minister went on to explain that Dublin hasn't had a new canal since the early 1800s.

"We're well overdue a new canal." the Minister made clear. "And the Port Tunnel or Canal was designed and built with this functionality in mind. That's why it has overhead inward drainage capabilities."

The tunnel will cost €752,000,000, while the final cost of the proposed canal is not known.

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